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Haven for the living Princess and the Pea

The shadow

I awoke early this morning, at about 3:15, from a deep sleep. I don’t know why I awoke. It wasn’t for any particular reason as I’d had no nightmare nor was there any sudden loud noise or distraction. But I was wide awake.

I sat up feeling cold and uneasy as though I wasn’t alone. I felt a shiver crawl up my spine as I sat there trying to get my head right. It took me some time to remember where I was. I’ve lived in three places in the last two months and don’t feel at home anywhere at the moment. Continue reading “The shadow”

Shapeshifter

You are the warm bath which melts my frozen heart.

You are the womb which cocoons me from the world.

You are the river letting my tears flow again.

You are the spring from which all life comes.

You are the waves of grief which hit.

You are Mariana’s Trench, a dark and unreachable place.

You are the freezing arctic sea.

You are the blade of ice where my heart used to be.

A poem about DSPS (Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome)

My love affair

With the night

Has turned into

A crippling blight

 

For while sweet stillness

Brings me to life.

When the sun rises

I am in strife

 

I cannot get up

When society rises.

I cannot sleep

When everyone retires.

 

The middle of my night,

Is the start of your day,

And I am wide awake

When your alertness starts to fray.

 

I live this life,

So removed from the world,

A 9-5 job,

Can only be hurled.

 

For when I try

to fit the mould

I’m always late,

And met with scold.

 

I am one of many,

With an invisible disability,

So please have compassion,

There is more to what you see.

Boat

A piece I wrote about being held back by fear of rejection and going for what you want. Inspired by a poem called “The Anchor“.

I wait patiently at the dock,

For skippers to come my way.

Hoping each time,

That I will find the one I’ve been longing for.

The one who will breathe life into these sails.

Who will tend to me, patching up my chipped paint,

My worn body,

Making me new again. Continue reading “Boat”

Empty

The hole in me is oceans wide.

From all the love I’ve been denied.

Filling it I have tried

With shopping, busyness, until I’m fried. Continue reading “Empty”

The unsafe space

A few weeks ago I moved into a new place in Olinda. After seeing the what was to be my new home I thought it was perfect. It was a beautiful old house only a short distance from the forest and township of Olinda.

When I spoke with my new landlord, who lives in the Northern Territory, she told me that her son, and my new house mate who we will refer to as Sam, is a nice guy who likes to keep to himself. When meeting with him for the first time he seemed like he would be easy to live with. He told me that he smoked some weed which didn’t bother me. But it wasn’t until I actually moved in that I began to realize exactly what he got up to. I would very quickly learn that he was high every single day. It’s not uncommon for me arrive home to find him puffing on a bong. It was not long after that when I learned that he also sells drugs to his mates. And not just marijuana. These are things that I don’t do and want to have nothing to do with. Continue reading “The unsafe space”

My only medicine

Dreaming of sweet summer days with you,

The world fades away

It is only us

Swimming in the sparkling sea,

Ripples of light dancing through me,

Everything I’ve been missing is crystal clear.

Continue reading “My only medicine”

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