hsphaven

Run rabbit run rabbit run run run

Run away from the sound of my gun.

You’ve decided you are done

Sustaining my heartbeat like a drum.

I thought you’d save me like God’s own son

But like Jesus’s cross I weighed a tonne

And you never loved me, yet along I was strung

Holding my hand like you were my rung

Acting like a surrogate mum.

Until I realised that you really stung

For you won my trust, then left me in a place that saw no sun.

Stuck in Wonderland, this is no fun.

I don’t know what’s real, and what’s imagine.

Screaming, drinking, what have I become?

So run rabbit run rabbit run run run

To your next victim, your previous one forgotten.

I am your computer

Notifications give you a boost

But one day you’ll realise I have you tied in a noose.

Your real life slips away

And is replaced by me,

You are now living a whole new reality.

You have lost all other hobbies,

And your ability to write.

Instead, you find, you can only type.

Your face burns from overuse,

You want to get away,

But, in my clasp, you will always stay.

While once you went online

just a few times a day,

Now you check Facebook until your mind starts to fray.

You feel out of control,

You’re screaming inside,

You turn to your blog in which you confide.

I stop you from sleeping,

You lie wide awake

Now you have come down with a nasty headache.

You realise you have a problem,

You try to seek some help,

But drugs get all the spotlight… no body hears your quiet yelp.

Yet you know I am just a drug in disguise.

I take away your stress.

And without me all that’s left is emptiness.

I am a bucket with a hole in its base. Nothing I put in will last. I turn to online dating in need of elevating but meaningful connection is scarce.

Continue reading “Dopamine Blues” →

The hole in me is oceans wide.

From all the love I’ve been denied.

Filling it I have tried

With shopping, busyness, until I’m fried. Continue reading “Empty” →

I am your only hope,

I will take away your pain.

I will be your umbrella

In the endless rain

 

Come to me, my weary child,

And I will give you rest.

Ignore those who oppose me,

For I do know you best.

 

Thirteen years of social exile,

Slander, fear and pretend.

A broken, fucked up family.

Losing your best friend.

 

The destruction of our planet,

No chance to start anew.

Radiation and noise everywhere you go,

This world is not for you.

 

You will not be taking your life,

For there’s no life left to take.

Your spirit died a long time back,

Your smile is only fake.

 

So when you’re feeling lonely,

Remember I am always here.

You don’t have to suffer

Yet another year.