Sometimes, when you have experienced so much sadness and loss in your life, you become sensitised to loss. Even things like emptying the bath tub and throwing things away hurt. Maybe it is a highly sensitive person thing (I heard of a case where a highly sensitive child was worried about hurting the water by draining it from the bath tub).

Below is a message I wrote, which says a lot about where I’m at right now:

“I bought a doll recently called Green Man. When I went to pick him up from the artist’s studio, he was sitting next to another green man the artist had made. She had them sitting together like they were family. She then posted this picture of them together to social media. Someone asked for more photos of them together. I regret so much that I didn’t buy both of them. They were just so expensive ($1000 each). But if I bought both I could have taken lots of pictures of them together. I could have lived through these dolls, vicariously experiencing belonging and connection through them!!!! They would be like the two soft clowns I had as a child: Coco and Noddy. My heart aches that the green men have been separated, and now Arlo (the other doll) is on his way to France! Why did she have to place them together!!!!! 😭😭😭 It’s all her fault for placing them together!!!!!”

art creatures